Hold on to your hats........it's going to be a VERY bumpy ride!
That's the best analogy I could come up with - sorry ;)
In a 24 hour time period, my "back-to-work" life went from part-time to full-time. This happened with the grace of God, the prayers of a family, the Christ-filled heart of a Principal, and the willingness to ask for help.
I am so grateful for God's presence in my life and for my faith in Him, even though at times it falls short.
It is going to be a BIG adjustment....I know I said that before, when I started part-time. But now those free mornings that I used for housework, errands & recharging my batteries are G.O.N.E. I'm certainly not the 1st person to go through this and I know I won't be the last. God brought me this far, I know he's not going to let me sink. I have to keep my eyes on the prize (Jesus).
I also did what I often DON'T do. I asked for help. From God, from my Principal, from my friends. And the funniest thing happened. They all offered to help me unconditionally....right off the bat. I am touched and blessed by those around me. I had one friend immediately say she will plan to pick up my preschooler every Monday and take him to play with her son (who is in his class & his best buddy) and then drop him off to me when I'm finishing work, thus saving us the cost of one day's child care and doing what I would have done on Monday's with him and our friends. She is Christ embodied.
Thank you, Jesus. For EVERYTHING.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
The "Almost" Mid-Week Slump...
Really? It's only Tuesday morning for Pete's sake!
But last week was a BIG week.....back to school & long, tiring days. I suppose I should give them a break. I for one needed one, so how can I not understand they need one too.
Yesterday was my first "official" day off during the week. My regular schedule, which began this week, allows me Mondays off and I had a mental list about a mile long of what to do. Then I met 3 great friends for coffee at 8:00 and this acceptance came over me.
I need the day off. It's not playing hookey.....it's therapeutic. My cup needed a refill. My batteries needed recharging.
So I literally spent the entire school day with these dear friends - we all dropped off our kids at 7:45. We all met up at Starbucks for coffee at 8:00. We all left at 10:45 to go pick up our preschoolers. We all took our preschoolers over to Chik-fil-a to play & have lunch since it was raining (the park was our plan but the weather didn't cooperate). We let the kids play in the indoor playcenter - eat lunch - return to playing....until 2:30 when we all left to pick up our elementary schoolers. I haven't had so much girlfriend time in months....maybe even a year? I don't have a clue when.
But the point is, that I needed a break. I needed to have the day off from my usual self-inflicted list of unachievable goals. My children do to - they may get that "break" in another way & they should, like an understanding parent when they are tired, extra hugs, game time when we get home, etc.
I want to balance the "c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, hurry up" with "I understand" & "it's okay, we'll work together".
Now I have to savor my coffee and get a few things done around here before it's my turn to get ready & out the door.
But last week was a BIG week.....back to school & long, tiring days. I suppose I should give them a break. I for one needed one, so how can I not understand they need one too.
Yesterday was my first "official" day off during the week. My regular schedule, which began this week, allows me Mondays off and I had a mental list about a mile long of what to do. Then I met 3 great friends for coffee at 8:00 and this acceptance came over me.
I need the day off. It's not playing hookey.....it's therapeutic. My cup needed a refill. My batteries needed recharging.
So I literally spent the entire school day with these dear friends - we all dropped off our kids at 7:45. We all met up at Starbucks for coffee at 8:00. We all left at 10:45 to go pick up our preschoolers. We all took our preschoolers over to Chik-fil-a to play & have lunch since it was raining (the park was our plan but the weather didn't cooperate). We let the kids play in the indoor playcenter - eat lunch - return to playing....until 2:30 when we all left to pick up our elementary schoolers. I haven't had so much girlfriend time in months....maybe even a year? I don't have a clue when.
But the point is, that I needed a break. I needed to have the day off from my usual self-inflicted list of unachievable goals. My children do to - they may get that "break" in another way & they should, like an understanding parent when they are tired, extra hugs, game time when we get home, etc.
I want to balance the "c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, hurry up" with "I understand" & "it's okay, we'll work together".
Now I have to savor my coffee and get a few things done around here before it's my turn to get ready & out the door.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Flying High.....and Coming In For a Landing
Well, it's been a few weeks now and I hesitate to say.....I am knocking on wood & IF I had a lucky rabbit's foot, I'd be rubbing it now......but it has not been too bad! That's really a good thing but I also know I'm in the "honeymoon" phase of work, I gush over it.....just love whom I work for & their philosophies...feel needed/wanted/appreciated. I'm in love (with my workplace, that is).
My family has been awesome - thank you, Jesus - this transition could have been awful, tearful, stressful, hairpulling. But my husband & kids have taken it all in stride. The past few weeks were all the preliminary stuff....prep work & organizing and my days have been very busy. I'm hoping that now that we are in a regular routine and the kids have started back to school, that my days will fall into a speed one notch down from where I've been. I LOVE to be busy - I've learned that about myself over the years. Relaxing & doing nothing always sounds divine but I realize if I have down time like that, I tend to fill it up and learned that having "projects" makes me feel like I'm accomplishing things & therefore makes me feel productive & happy. But the past few weeks have been SO busy for me that my house looks like a bomb went off in it, followed by a tornado passing through it. It's bad. And that makes me feel stressed, uneasy & scattered. So coming home after a full day of work is not the calming thing it should be.....hoping this week will allow for a little TLC to my house :D
My family has been awesome - thank you, Jesus - this transition could have been awful, tearful, stressful, hairpulling. But my husband & kids have taken it all in stride. The past few weeks were all the preliminary stuff....prep work & organizing and my days have been very busy. I'm hoping that now that we are in a regular routine and the kids have started back to school, that my days will fall into a speed one notch down from where I've been. I LOVE to be busy - I've learned that about myself over the years. Relaxing & doing nothing always sounds divine but I realize if I have down time like that, I tend to fill it up and learned that having "projects" makes me feel like I'm accomplishing things & therefore makes me feel productive & happy. But the past few weeks have been SO busy for me that my house looks like a bomb went off in it, followed by a tornado passing through it. It's bad. And that makes me feel stressed, uneasy & scattered. So coming home after a full day of work is not the calming thing it should be.....hoping this week will allow for a little TLC to my house :D
Saturday, August 7, 2010
The Easy Week is Over & Sew What....
The dreaded "first week" is over. Guess what? It wasn't so dreadful after all. They usually aren't.
Next week will be my "bootcamp" week......5 full days that include dropping & picking up the kiddos at a sitter's house. If I am able to string a complete sentence together by the week's end, it will be a miracle.
Today I continued my quest to pinch pennys by making a faux roman shade for my home office (AKA Command Central). I have wanted to do this for some time & I always seemed to have a good procrastinating excuse; I have tried one or two times unsuccessfully to make a similar project. But this time I'm relying on the Thrifty Decor Chick, a wonderful blogger who insisted this was "Sew Simple". My first attempt was off....somehow....not sure what exactly I did wrong. But after a few hours of living with it and trying to tell myself it looked "fine", I HAD to tweak it....flying by the seat of my pants. After all that, you know what? I like it! Success! And the cost......Nada......well, at one time it cost me something but today zero dollars and zero cents. I had the rod, had the fabric, thread, etc.
My next project will be to make the same faux roman shades for the breakfast room....but first I need to decide on the fabric & do a little looking at the first set from the OUTSIDE; I need to see what someone else sees from the backside since the breakfast room windows open up to the much used patio. ;)
I love sewing. It is so peaceful...even when I mess up. There is just something calm about it and I'm glad I had the afternoon to do it.
What do I not love? Wasps. Wasps that chase me down & sting me in particular. Well to their defense I did poke their nest. Don't ask me why. Seriously. Apparently I momentarily thought I was smarter than a wasp. I was just outside picking limes from my tree when I noticed several wasps working on a nest in the lime tree...right near where I just picked limes. I had this brilliant idea I could just knock the nest out of my lime tree & they'd be confused & all "hey, where did the nest go? Huh? Weird.". But guess what? They weren't confused, they were pissed. As in "Oh no you d'int! This is SO not cool, dude" and inflicted 2 nasty stings on me before I ran away like a cartoon character waving my arms & screaming. I learned a thing or two about wasps today....like, don't poke a nest & did you know, they can sting you over and over and over and it doesn't bother them at all? Did you know the other wasps "smell" the venom & it's like a signal for them to sting you too.
So this is tired, swollen Momma signing off!
Next week will be my "bootcamp" week......5 full days that include dropping & picking up the kiddos at a sitter's house. If I am able to string a complete sentence together by the week's end, it will be a miracle.
Today I continued my quest to pinch pennys by making a faux roman shade for my home office (AKA Command Central). I have wanted to do this for some time & I always seemed to have a good procrastinating excuse; I have tried one or two times unsuccessfully to make a similar project. But this time I'm relying on the Thrifty Decor Chick, a wonderful blogger who insisted this was "Sew Simple". My first attempt was off....somehow....not sure what exactly I did wrong. But after a few hours of living with it and trying to tell myself it looked "fine", I HAD to tweak it....flying by the seat of my pants. After all that, you know what? I like it! Success! And the cost......Nada......well, at one time it cost me something but today zero dollars and zero cents. I had the rod, had the fabric, thread, etc.
My next project will be to make the same faux roman shades for the breakfast room....but first I need to decide on the fabric & do a little looking at the first set from the OUTSIDE; I need to see what someone else sees from the backside since the breakfast room windows open up to the much used patio. ;)
I love sewing. It is so peaceful...even when I mess up. There is just something calm about it and I'm glad I had the afternoon to do it.
What do I not love? Wasps. Wasps that chase me down & sting me in particular. Well to their defense I did poke their nest. Don't ask me why. Seriously. Apparently I momentarily thought I was smarter than a wasp. I was just outside picking limes from my tree when I noticed several wasps working on a nest in the lime tree...right near where I just picked limes. I had this brilliant idea I could just knock the nest out of my lime tree & they'd be confused & all "hey, where did the nest go? Huh? Weird.". But guess what? They weren't confused, they were pissed. As in "Oh no you d'int! This is SO not cool, dude" and inflicted 2 nasty stings on me before I ran away like a cartoon character waving my arms & screaming. I learned a thing or two about wasps today....like, don't poke a nest & did you know, they can sting you over and over and over and it doesn't bother them at all? Did you know the other wasps "smell" the venom & it's like a signal for them to sting you too.
So this is tired, swollen Momma signing off!
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Thoughts on First Days.....and Second Days...
So the first day of work came & went & I didn't even blog about it! Maybe I was just too exhausted! I think I worked myself up so much beforehand that by the time I finished, picked up the kids, came home, made dinner & got the crew to bed....there wasn't much left in me.
It wasn't as hard as I'd expected.
I'm VERY blessed. It is a GREAT place to work. It is warm, encouraging, understanding, supportive of "family first" and enthusiastic. HUGE pluses.
Today was my second day but it was spent in one of those "mandatory" new hire trainings that last ALL DAY and I had to drive an hour to get there. So maybe not as much of a high note as yesterday - but grateful you only need to do those trainings one time :D Tomorrow & the following day I have more trainings but my lovely employer gave me off on Friday to rest & recover for next week.
I feel the blood returning to all the parts of my body it rushed out of. Not as much to worry about as I thought; but...I am, after all, a worrier. That's my nature. I feel braver, more confident, more certain of these decisions and happier now that the week has begun.
Still have to build up the "work" stamina. My dear husband said tonight "I have trouble feel bad about how achy or tired you are from SITTING all day". Well har-de-har-har. I wasn't looking for sympathy - just commenting how it was hard to sit in uncomfortable chairs for 8 hours! You know, Moms MOVE a lot! There is no SITTING & eating BON-BONS...no matter what he likes to think has been going on while I was a stay-at-home Mom ;) Sitting very still doesn't happen much with kids at home. Gratefully I won't be just sitting when my job falls into place over the next few weeks.
But I am NOT complaining.....feeling achy reminds me I am alive!
It wasn't as hard as I'd expected.
I'm VERY blessed. It is a GREAT place to work. It is warm, encouraging, understanding, supportive of "family first" and enthusiastic. HUGE pluses.
Today was my second day but it was spent in one of those "mandatory" new hire trainings that last ALL DAY and I had to drive an hour to get there. So maybe not as much of a high note as yesterday - but grateful you only need to do those trainings one time :D Tomorrow & the following day I have more trainings but my lovely employer gave me off on Friday to rest & recover for next week.
I feel the blood returning to all the parts of my body it rushed out of. Not as much to worry about as I thought; but...I am, after all, a worrier. That's my nature. I feel braver, more confident, more certain of these decisions and happier now that the week has begun.
Still have to build up the "work" stamina. My dear husband said tonight "I have trouble feel bad about how achy or tired you are from SITTING all day". Well har-de-har-har. I wasn't looking for sympathy - just commenting how it was hard to sit in uncomfortable chairs for 8 hours! You know, Moms MOVE a lot! There is no SITTING & eating BON-BONS...no matter what he likes to think has been going on while I was a stay-at-home Mom ;) Sitting very still doesn't happen much with kids at home. Gratefully I won't be just sitting when my job falls into place over the next few weeks.
But I am NOT complaining.....feeling achy reminds me I am alive!
Sunday, August 1, 2010
First Day Jitters...
It's not quite the "first day" yet....that's tomorrow.
But I have jitters. Butterflies. Whatever you want to call it. I think it's more of that uncertainty & questioning whether or not I'm doing the right thing. Oh, I know I am.....my family needs this, but it's a big change. I don't think I let myself think about how big of a change it was going to be. But my husband has taken it upon himself to let our children know how BIG of a deal it was that "Mommy is going back to work". It was his way of helping the kids understand & appreciate this sacrifice.
The only thing is.....it sort of hit me smack in the face as I overheard him talking....it IS a big change and it is going to take a LOT of adjustment on all our parts. No shocker there ;) It's just that in my Sally Sunshine state of mind I was not letting myself deal with that reality. Oh, my Rachel Rational side totally knows we can handle it & we'll be fine after an adjustment period (don't you love how I name my different sides!); it's just that sometimes I like to think (maybe I should say "pretend" because it's not reality) that I've got it all under control all the time and that the road will be smooth just because I say so. Ha! That's when I need a slap of reality to remind me it's N-O-R-M-A-L to NOT have it all together & to need help & to have bad days & to have bumpy roads. Well that's me - Normal ;)
But I have jitters. Butterflies. Whatever you want to call it. I think it's more of that uncertainty & questioning whether or not I'm doing the right thing. Oh, I know I am.....my family needs this, but it's a big change. I don't think I let myself think about how big of a change it was going to be. But my husband has taken it upon himself to let our children know how BIG of a deal it was that "Mommy is going back to work". It was his way of helping the kids understand & appreciate this sacrifice.
The only thing is.....it sort of hit me smack in the face as I overheard him talking....it IS a big change and it is going to take a LOT of adjustment on all our parts. No shocker there ;) It's just that in my Sally Sunshine state of mind I was not letting myself deal with that reality. Oh, my Rachel Rational side totally knows we can handle it & we'll be fine after an adjustment period (don't you love how I name my different sides!); it's just that sometimes I like to think (maybe I should say "pretend" because it's not reality) that I've got it all under control all the time and that the road will be smooth just because I say so. Ha! That's when I need a slap of reality to remind me it's N-O-R-M-A-L to NOT have it all together & to need help & to have bad days & to have bumpy roads. Well that's me - Normal ;)
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